Our Love is a Forbidden Love by Tracy Wilson

Letter 1: A Letter to my Forbidden

Disclaimer:

A Letter to my Forbidden:

It all started off with just the simple wish for the pleasure of company. Company where I would need not wear the mask I show the world, company that I could simply be a man in. I needed not the perverse sexual pleasures youkai regularly partake in, only the pleasure of comfortable silence, of inconsequential talks. But I did not expect it to go this far, never this far, never this quickly.

You were to me but a beautiful geisha, a woman who gave me the peace I so needed at times of strife and trouble. You were the escape I searched out, when my world was upside down. When I could not find the quiet and calm I so earnestly yearned, I would seek your soothing company at these times, I would always find you awaiting me as if you knew the moment my mind had decided, that I were on my way to you. And you would stand there with that gentle smile, with a knowing look in your eye that I could never take anger at. You never looked at me with sympathy or pity that I had to seek your company for the peace I could never find, only with quiet understanding.

But quiet was never something you were my beautiful geisha, you were but the opposite. Loud, rude, obnoxious, outspoken and opinionative; you were all those things. You started off as quiet, yes, but that was a façade I easily saw through, and when we were finally at ease with each other's company (I at least) you would show me short glimpses of the person you were. Until I became so intrigued, so curious as to the real you, I demanded you drop your façade and show me.

I would admit this to no other, only to you my geisha, that that is the moment when I know for sure I began to fall. A fall I could never prevent, for a great demon as myself was too blind by pride and arrogance to realize what was occurring, too proud to acknowledge a feeling, an emotion I would always pummel into the corner of my mind. And when I did I knew for sure, for in that instant all was clear to me. The love for a woman so forbidden, so sinful that it cannot be spoken.

You are a high class geisha, a business-woman with the intelligence to shame many of the demon lords of Japan. Your beauty makes many a demoness envious, makes even more demons insane with lust. Your quiet wit and tongue as sharp as a katana, even left me speechless at times of disagreement. Your kind heart that freely gives love to the kamuro, shinzo, oirans, and maikos, was what really struck me, for you gave me no prejudice. Prejudice that so freely reined in your species, a species you knew I hated with a passion. For you are human, and that is why you are so forbidden, so sinful.

At times I would often wonder it why you were the head okaasan of a demon okiya, being human. I never did find it my concern to question the workings of your okiya, but I still wonder. Now I wish I found out, now I wish I had asked questions because I no nothing of you, and now I've lost you my geisha.

Our love is forbidden, something that we are not to share, not to know, not to experience. Our love is something I should feel ashamed for, but I do not nor will I ever turn my back from it. Keep in your heart the knowledge that I love you and always will...

My mate, my geisha, my forbidden, my koi... my Kagome...

Your Immortal.