"He wasn't sure what possessed him to him to stay"
I know this is a far old chapter realizing that there are already 200 and so posted, but I thought I'd let you know about that and the fact that I'm totally hooked with this!
Okay Dear.
138-first word is two combined. Your word count is now off.
142-in the second sentence, it should be warnings, not warning.
149-'They were never going to be harmed' Sorry, makes no sense. She's talking to Sesshomaru, right?
198-I can't believe you misspelled dying.
So, here's what I've got for you: Was he actually KILLING the demons in the village, or just wounding them? 'Raining blood' seems to be killing... Why is Mayumi looking in the west for help instead of going strait to the southern lord?
Annyyyywaayyyy I had a whole other big spiel, but then I realized my mistake...I was confusing your story with either Forthright or silver's story.... Not in a large way, just as to what each character played as.
So all in all, I think you did a good job : ) Your reviewers are pretty correct lovey. I enjoyed it a lot. Now stop looking at your phone and get back to work!
~Kaikie
I lived in Wisconsin for several years, I totally get what you mean. ;D We totally prepared for our games, still root them on from Hawaii!