thats totally sad! but if you want you can add this to my moulin rouge challenge, and grab a banner ^_^

that was beautiful but sad

Not a fan of this one.  The grammer and such wasn't too bad, it was more of the storyline that didn't really make any sense to me. 

Huh. I read this a long time ago, I think, but for some reason didn't review. So now I will!

Commas, commas, commas, my dear writer! Work on 'em commas. That's the only thing I have to say for now.

Overall, I don't think it was your best work. I think it would have been better if it was shorter, without some of the details, but I do look forward to reading more of your stuff. =D

That was really sad, *sniffle* very well written, great job!